Okay, I'm a little behind on posting the chapters but I will try to condense the last two sections here:

Chapters seven & eight: the "older" women are to be teachers of good things...to the younger women. So far we've learned the things that we should or shouldn't do as Christian women. Now God is telling us to pass those on, whether we are physically older than another woman or spiritually older.

John McArthur states "When godly Christian women do not infuse the younger generation with the things of God, the church comes to dire straits." And isn't this true.

We as women are to teach our children (boys and girls, nieces, granddaughters, etc) and to be teachers of younger women in the church. It is a God-given role.

We are to teach these women (both our children and the women of our church), how to love their husbands, their childre, to be sensible, to be pure, to be homemakers, to be kind and to follow their husband's leadership. Most of this can be done just by our example but other times it requires verbal direction.

Why are we to do this? To encourage the younger women. How I have been encouraged when someone older than me shares something they went through that I can say, wow, I thought I was the only one to deal with that...and then to learn how they handled it.

Elizabeth and Mary is a good example of this. When Mary found out she was pregnant, she went to be with Elizabeth for two months. During that time, they shared a lot. The Bible doesn't say what specifically but imagine two women together for two months. Elizabeth encouraged Mary spiritually through example, through sharing devotions together, by teaching her to be a mother...even though at that time she was in the same place that Mary was - first time mom. This made me realize that when Mary went to visit Elizabeth, she didn't know Elizabeth was pregnant - but she went to her anyway needing a strong woman to lean on. Just because someone hasn't been through the issue we are going through, doesn't mean that we can't ask for their direction and prayer support.

We must be in a grow and show mode. We should always be seeking God's direction - growing and then taking that to teach those around us - show. If you are not growing, that needs to be your first priority. Then once you are growing, then you are better off to show.

Titus 2:3-5 gives us the basis for what we should teach. But over all and through all we teach, one consistent element needs to be in all encounters – spiritual life/devotional life. We are to teach that, yes, we as older godly woman are here for encouragement but to get the true answers, we need to seek the Lord. And hold them accountable.

Why? They could turn to so many other sources for practical advice. What you as a godly woman could pass on about marriage, family and home life, is spiritual instruction.

We are all older than someone. When I started this study, I thought about my younger women as those in their 20s and early 30s...but God doesn't limit it to that...he says younger women...which for me starts with the little girls in the nursery, my nieces and the little girls at church, the teen girls, the newly married, almost married and the 20s and 30s. Most of my reach with them will be in the way I live but God gives me a chance with each of them to make a difference by word of mouth - working in the nursery to teach them to respect their fathers, working with the young girls and teens to talk to them about purity, talking to those who are about to be married/just married on what it means to respect your husband and then there are the older women than me that are newer Christians than me that I can also have an impact on.

Think of who is older and younger than you and seek them out to either teach them or ask for ways to be taught...watch them and learn from them.

Chapters nine and ten: admonish the young women to love their husbands.

I was glad this fell on the week of Valentine's day. Then the day before sharing it with my group, we were asked to join in the visitation emphasis that evening. So, I printed out this weeks lesson and passed it out to all the women who came into the church that night and even emailed it to a few. I felt like this was an important lesson for every married women and those who's husband's have left them (one way or another) because this is a lesson for us to live and then also to share. This is #1 on God's list of things to do.

Our role as a wife is to help our husband - Woman was created after man, from man, for the man, & for a purpose – to help him (Gen 2:18). This means that the man needed a companion, a helper, someone to complete him; to follow our husband - Follow or Submit is a military term portraying the voluntary lining up of one person under the authority of another, to willingly rank oneself under another. It is a choice. We are not only to submit to our husbands because it is God’s will but also because God’s Word would be ridiculed if the watching world were to see a disobedient wife. When we fail to follow our husband, the word of God is dishonored; to respect our husband - Ephesians 5:33 – Actively demonstrating & showing high regard for him in ways that all can see. Your admiration should be always on display, so no one can miss it; and love our husband.

This love was not to meant as a romantic love but as a friendship love - greek word is philandros. A willing and determined love. When you think of friendship love, you think of your best girlfriend. What do you do for her? Pray for her? Call her? Check on how she's doing? Ask her to lunch? Now traslate that to your husband. It is obvious, it is demonstrated, it is communicated by how we act toward him. In the manner in which we take care of him. In the way we speak to him. In the way we speak about him. In the things we do for him.

Love is a choice. Yes, we all know there are days that we have to will ourselves to love our husbands. Then, because we repeatedly choose to be loving and devoted, our devotion grows into friendship that is solid and lasting and deeply ingrained. We are to love our husband as a best friend, as someone we enjoy and enjoy being with. To spoil him. To think of him. To pray for him. To encourage him. To welcome him. To nurture a deep friendship with him.

Choose to be like the Shulamite woman was with King Solomon - she couldnt' stop talking about him to others and to him. (Song of Solomon 5)

Three practices for your marriage: 1. Pray for him. What a great gift. Think of all the things about him: his job, his coworkers, his projects, his role as a husband, provider, father, his roles at church, etc and choose to pray for him each day in each of these areas and any others that come to mind. 2. Praise him. To others and directly to him. For some men, it may be hard to find something to praise about. But begin looking and you will be amazed at how many things you find to praise him about. 3. Pamper him. Yes, men like to be pampered too. One lady mentioned that she brings her husband tea every afternoon when he gets home. Another bakes her husband cookies each night before bed (she makes the dough up ahead of time and puts the balls of dough in the freezer so she can pull them out as she needs them). What does your husband like...figure it out and do it...daily.

These are little things – but they are little things that deliver a loud and a large message!

Think of ways that you can start helping your husband today. Think of ways to start following your husband today. Think of ways to start respecting your husband today and ways to love your husband today.

And now think of this as being the older woman...what an impact you can have on the younger women by making this area a priority and a visual example to them.

Not married yet - watch other women who are and seek out those who are living their life out this way.

Husband deceased or divorced - you still can have an impact on the younger women by the way you talk about your husband and by sharing things that you learned when you were married. Everyone can make an impact on someone else.

Next week...A high calling to your family.

Okay, so the Amy's have made me think about the fact that just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean I can't do something to prepare myself to lose weight after the baby. So, I'm throwing it out there for ideas. I know the traditional walking and doing video tapes to help but any other ideas? I have to watch that I don't necessarily lose weight because I am already struggling to gain the weight that I should for this baby - I wish that was the case when I'm not pregnant. Things to do at my desk, to do with Will, to do when the weather is bad, things that take 5 minutes at a time, any ideas welcome. I'm trying to encourage Todd with exercising as well so I don't want to be sitting on the couch but at the same time expecting him to do something. Watching the Biggest Loser has helped both of us with general motivation but now I need specific ideas. Thanks.

A little bit behind but here are chapters 5 and 6...

Titus 2:3 - "the older women [are to] be...not given to much wine.

Okay, well that's not hard being that I'm Nazarene, right. Well, this can be applied to many other things.

First off, let's look at the 3rd and 4th words - to much. Paul didn't tell Titus to teach that they shouldn't drink wine but that they should not be given to much wine. We are to live in a manner that is characterized by moderation and restraint in all things and in all areas of life. This is where the bulk of the study focuses this week. Now before I get responses about whether we should drink at all...please refrain as the point of this scripture is that we are to learn self-control, moderator, personal discipline...in all areas of our life. Moderation in our food, in our purchases, in our TV watching, in our speech, in our emotions, etc.

Secondly, how does this relate to being a godly older woman and our influence on younger women? Well, you are living by example and you are allowing your life to be in control so that it allows time for you to minister to these ladies. It also makes us more approachable. If we are always out of control in our words or emotions, the younger women will see this and not be likely to come to us for counsel...and we have now lost out on a great God-given opportunity to minister to them.

There are three areas that Elizabeth talks about gaining control or being disciplined in: physical, emotional and practical. Physical being what you eat, drink, spend, watch, read, etc. Emotional being how we manage pressures and respond with a calm spirit. And practical being how we alot our time and manager our life so that we are not always behind the eight ball.

Will these three areas be easy to get under control...depends on how out of control they are. I think everyone of us has at least one thing under the physical category we could work on...and emotional...whooo. Practical would be the hardest for me because I am a no watch, last minute, figure it out kind of girl. Now that helps with the emotional area because things flow off my back pretty easily and I am able to be pretty calm under pressure. But if you talk about my discipline in cleaning or not overloading my schedule, etc. I need a lot of work and a lot of prayer in this area.

This chapter was good for me because I learned that not only is personal discipline a good thing...it's a Biblical thing that God requires from each of us. And if I'm not following these guidelines, I'm not following God's will for my life. Ouch! That makes it more of a priority now huh.

My goal, even though I'm 21+ weeks pregnant and tired all the time, God requires me to make this a priority in my life...so I will make a point of working on my practical disciplines at home this week and going forward. There are so many benefits...less work to do if you are in control of your schedule and work load, becoming a better model for my son and those around me, I will be able to spend more time with my friends and family because my environment won't have control over me but instead me over it and I will become a more godly woman.

One statement Elizabeth makes is " A woman who is in control of self, not controlled by self."

Chapters # 3 and 4 - the dreaded topic for women...gossip.

But what I liked from this author was that she didn't focus just on gossip as we all think of it. She expanded it to slander and false accuser. Isn't that what we do when we gossip? The greek word in the Bible for slanderer is diabolos. In Titus 2:3 and 1 Timothy 3:11 diabolos is literally translated to "she-devil" when talking about women and gossip. I don't think that's something I want to be called.

When talking about the causes of gossip, Elizabeth lists an evil heart, hatred, idleness and foolishness. "I work very hard at "wisdom," at praying for it, at reaching for it, at attaining it, keeping it, using it, and at becoming more of a woman of wisdom. And it's shocking to realize that every time I gossip, I have just declared myself to be a fool!" Ouch...but true.

When we gossip, we not only hurt the person we're talking about, but the person we're talking to and ourselves. The person we are talking to has to figure out what to do with that information - pass it on, clear it from their minds, allow it to sway their oppinion of the person talked about, etc. That is a bad thing for us to cause for that other person. And then for us, it can change other's oppinions of us as the spreaders of this true or untrue information, and it can jeopardize our ministry. Think about it - when you gossip, you are disqualifying yourself from ministry because ministry is to help people but with gossip, you are doing just the opposite.

In the study guide, Elizabeth mentions three categories of gossip. Malicious gossip - consciously and deliberately hurtful, rationalization - you have convinced yourself that you are doing it for "the good" of the other - i.e. a prayer request or personal concern, and innocent gossip - true concern but the gossiper may be trying to prove to others "how helpful she really is." Ouch to all of these. I know there have been times that I have been guilty of all three. I found myself just last week in category three and as the words came out of my mouth, I almost gasped internally. It is so easy to get caught up in gossip - especially the rationalization and innocent gossip.

One of the women in the group asked how can you know for sure whether you are gossiping or are truly concerned. My first thought was to go to the motivation of your heart and then to think about whether you would say what you said to the person you are talking about. If you are truly concerned, you would be willing to go to that person and share with them the concern...and isn't that what we should do because talking to someone else isn't going to make anything better. In this case, it was a family matter and they needed to determine a course of action...as long as the words that are being said are not slandering the person, I cannot say this is gossip.

As we talked about last week, whatever we fill ourselves with is what will flow out of us. So if we allow our hearts to be hearts of nurture and our tongues are used to glorify God, we will not be able to gossip or slander - but will be women of high calling.

How have these chapters changed me, hopefully...I am more aware of what comes out of my mouth, what I allow myself to listen to and that I have to be aware how gossip not only effects me but the hearer and the person it's about.

Prayer: Lord, may I think before I speak, may I think of those who hear my words and may they only be to build other's up not to tear them down.

Okay, so other than at work, I don't spend a lot of time on my computer. I get flack all the time from my sisters that I don't update my facebook page or comments from you all that I need to post something to my blog. Today, it is slower at work and I told Amy a couple weeks ago I would post something, so I guess I better.

Hopefully tonight the latest sonogram picture will be posted. We are about 19 weeks along and the baby weighs about 9 oz. I understand how they can do length measurements but how can they measure weight??? Oh well, the baby (yes, we're not finding out if it's a girl or boy until we deliver which is driving everyone crazy) is healthy and growing and I'm not getting nauseous any more...so pictures to come.

As for what I told Amy I would blog about:

I am in charge of the St. Paul's women's Wednesday night Bible study. We started the book A Woman's High Calling by Elizabeth George last week. After attending the Come to the Fire conference last October, I really felt impressed to lead a study on becoming a Titus 2 woman. Amazingly Elizabeth wrote an entire book on about 3 versus from this small book - it is only on one page in the Bible I used last Wednesday so I almost missed it.

So far, I have been very drawn into what she has to say. To be honest, I started the book for selfish reasons - I wanted the older women in my life - not just in my church - to realize that they are called to be spiritual leaders to me and the other younger women, not just hospitality leaders. As I began the first chapter, I realized that while that is something I so need, God has a lot more to say to me before even talking to the ladies in the study about stepping up. So, I began last week focusing on the fact that the most important thing is for me to be changed...and if the other ladies allow God to speak to them and change them from the inside out, so be it...but I was going to soak in as much as I could for myself.

I would love to extend this study to any women who come to my blog. I'm going to try to share my thoughts and things I learn each week and hope to hear from others so we can all grow to be godly women together.

First two chapters: What is in us, is what comes out. If there's nothing overflowing from us, how do we expect other's to see God in us? I used a visual aid at our study of a pitcher of water half full. It was placed in the room before everyone got there. At the end of the study, I asked them if they noticed the pitcher. They said they saw it but didn't think anything about it. I then asked them, if it had water overflowing out of it, would they have noticed it. And of course the answer was yes. In the same way, if we are not filling our lives with whatever is true, noble, just, pure, lovely, good, virtuous, and praiseworthy (Proverbs 23:7), how do we expect people to see that flowing out of us.

Elizabeth shares in chapter two that the first two ways to become a godly woman are through the meditations of your mind and the things that leave your mouth. If you fill yourself with godly things, that is what is going to flow out of you. If you fill yourself with things that are not so godly (books, conversations, tv shows, movies, etc) and allow your mouth to speak ungodly things (slander and gossip - discussed in chapter 3), that is what other's are going to see. And when they see those things, there is no way for them to see God.

Some suggestions she gave as ways to change your mind and heart: be in prayer - prayers of praise and adoration throughout the day. Pick some place or thing you do that you do a lot throughout your day, if you are at home - choose entering your kitchen, if you drive a lot - choose a red light, etc. and each of those times, offer up a prayer of adoration to God. Choose a psalm and read it out loud in the morning - then reflect on it and make it yours througout the day. Find a hymn in your personal or church hymnal and sing it (even sing it with your families) - think of all the silly jingles that stay in your mind all day that annoy you...now think of replacing that with a hymn. Great ways to mediatate on what is true, noble, etc.

I tried a few of these last week before the study...and boy does it make a difference. Even the things that would have normally brought me down at work, didn't because I was so filled with God and thoughts of His love and protection that those things didn't mean anything. I also found myself choosing to not watch shows that I had watched for years - not ones that had in your face bad things but enough that as I thought of them - they didn't match up with Proverbs 23:7. And from that, I found more time to spend with my family, working on things that matter - my scrapbooking memories for Will, and for my relationship with God. I actually pulled out my iPod and listened to praise music - apparently singing loudly as Todd came in and asked if I could remove one ear bud so I could hear myself. :-) I told him that I was worshiping and could hear myself which he appreciated and left me to that...but I did tone it down a little...

The first week is always easy because you're gung ho about changing...the second and subsequent weeks seem to trail off a little...but I think because I am blogging and holding myself accountable, that will help.

My prayer this week - God allow me to be so filled with all that is true, pure, lovely...godly, that those things will have no where to go but to spill out to others. Allow them to see you...not me this week.

Skip the hustle, bustle and long lines of department store shopping and come on over for a quiet afternoon of holiday shopping. Let us help you personalize your gifts for all those special people in your life. All gifts are 100% satisfaction guaranteed and come with free gift wrapping. Free delivery and lay away plans are available. Great stocking stuffers available! Lots of items on sale.

People to remember: your husband/boyfriend (great men’s products available), best friends, grandparents, clients, minister’s (or minister’s wives), teachers, secretaries, bosses, co-worker gift exchanges, babysitters, mail carriers, neighbors, stylists etc.

Many individual and gift sets at great prices. My favorites: the men’s cologne (nicknamed baby # 2 in a bottle – which I’m getting for Todd – a little late since # 2 is already in the works but better late than never), the satin hands or satin lips gift sets and the lotus & bamboo lotion.

Just for showing up, you get a 10% discount on your entire purchase – whether it’s all for you or for others PLUS an additional 5% if you bring a guest.

Join us November 10th from 1-3 p.m., for a Mary Kay Holiday Party with great holiday music and some great snacks.

Please reply with approximately what time you plan to stop by so that we can make sure that Dana is available to assist you.

Let me know if you need directions.